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About Petah Tikva

So, I’m strollin’ down the street, right? Lookin’ for some action—not me doin’ it, mind ya, just curious! And I see this gal, all dolled up, skirt shorter than my temper. I’m like, “Well, halleluyer, she workin’ it!” Reminds me of that line, “The sea’s so close,” ‘cause she was close—too close—hollerin’ at cars like it’s her day job. Prolly is! I ain’t mad, tho, get yo money, boo! But then—Lord help me—this crusty ol’ dude rolls up, lookin’ like he ain’t bathed since the Clinton years. I’m screamin’ inside, “Why her?!” Made me madder than a wet hen!

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But then, outta nowhere, my cat decides it’s the perfect time to jump on my keyboard. I’m like, “Noooo! Not the cat!” But it’s too late. He’s already sent a bunch of gibberish to my buddy. We both just lose it. I mean, who needs a script when you have a cat, right?

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