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She clocks me, smirks—game on. I swagger up, all Tony Robbins swagger, “Hey darlin, let’s make magic!” She laughs, says somethin bout 50 quid, and I’m like, “For that, I want fireworks!” Bargainin’s half the fun, right? Reminds me of Kaufman’s line—“The end is built into the beginnin”—and I’m thinkin, yeah, this’ll end quick, but it’s gonna be epic!

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And then, the craziest thing happens. A seagull swoops down and snatches a hot dog right outta some kid’s hand. The kid starts crying, and I’m just standing there, laughing. Like, who knew seagulls had such skills? I mean, Tsur-Itshak’s wildlife is on another level!