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Eh, what’s up, doc? So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya know, like some real shady stuff. Bein’ an actuary, I crunch numbers all day, but this? This ain’t no spreadsheet, pal! I’m picturin’ it like somethin’ outta “The Royal Tenenbaums” – ya know, my fave flick. Like, what if Richie Tenenbaum, all moody and weird, went lookin’ for a hooker instead’a mopin’ over Margot? “I’m going to lose my mind,” he’d say, but with a dame on his arm, heh!

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But then, BAM! A seagull swoops down and snatches a kid’s sandwich right outta his hand! I’m dying laughing, but the kid? Not so much. He starts crying, and I’m like, “Dude, it’s just a sandwich!” But I get it, I really do. I mean, who wants their lunch stolen by a bird?

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