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About Florence

First off, it’s shady as hell. You don’t just stroll up to some gal and go, “Hey, how’s biz?” Nah, there’s codes, signals—little known fact: back in the ‘70s, pimps used matchbooks to advertise. Dropped ‘em at bars, scribbled numbers inside. Clever, but sleazy. I hate clever sleaze. Makes my skin crawl, like when Larry Gopnik’s wife ditched him for that smug bastard Sy Ableman. “I’m a serious man,” Larry whines—yeah, me too, pal, ‘til I’m scoutin’ hookers.

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I finally get my act together and head to the park. Parco della Rocca, man, it’s beautiful! I love it there. The trees, the vibe, the people. But guess what? There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re LOUD. Like, I’m trying to enjoy nature, and they’re screaming like it’s the World Cup. I’m like, “Chill, kids! It’s just a game!”

Giro test: LPR wins team time trial