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About Naples

Anywho, I find this other chick online—proper fit, yeah? Chat her up, all smooth-like, “Fancy a rendezvous, baby?” She’s game, meets me at this dive bar—neon buzzin’, vibes screamin’ ‘60s. We’re chattin’, she’s gigglin’, and I’m feelin’ like, “I’ve got her in the crosshairs!”—movie moment, baby! But—plot twist—she’s an undercover copper! Nearly shat meself, swear down! “Abort mission!” I’m yellin’ in me head, but I play it cool, “Cheers, luv, gotta jet!”

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Next, I head to the local market. It’s buzzing with life! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I grab some tomatoes, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her garden, and I’m like, “That’s awesome!” But inside, I’m thinking, “Lady, I gotta go!”