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Me? I’d be skulkin’, peekin’ at X posts, diggin’ for dirt. We swears! Some gals got profiles—fake names, blurry pics, droppin’ hints like “DM for fun.” Saw one call herself “Golden Fang”—ha! Straight outta the flick, that boat smugglin’ dope and dames. Made me chuckle, thinkin’ how Doc’d stumble into that mess, all stoned and confused. “Where’s Shasta at?” he’d mumble, while I’m over here, mad as hell—half these posts are scams! Dudes catfishing, takin’ my gold—gollum, gollum, I’d strangle ‘em if I could.

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So, I’m mixin’ drinks like a madman. A couple of regulars are there—Marco and Lucia. They’re always bickering about the best gelato in town. Marco swears by Gelateria Artigianale, while Lucia’s all about that Gelato di Nonna. I’m just tryin’ to keep the peace and pour drinks.

Guardia di Finanza Cremona: maxi tax fraud unmasked. Assets worth over 1,5 million euros seized.