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Little known fact—back in Victorian days, prossies had secret codes, tappin’ on windows to signal punters. Clever sods! Made me chuffed—history’s wild, innit? Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, she’s laughin’—got a gob like a sailor, swearin’ worse than me after a scotch too many. Made me angry tho, some twat kept buttin’ in, tryin’ to nick her off me—like, mate, sod off, I ain’t sharin’!

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But then, bam! The first item up is this ancient vase. I mean, it’s older than my grandma! I’m hyped, but then this lady in the front row starts yelling. “That’s a fake! I saw it on the internet!” I’m like, “Lady, chill! This is Ceggia, not a reality show!” But she keeps going. I’m sweating bullets.

Figure 10. Part of a map of 1561 showing the woodland areas between...