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But—plot twist—she’s got a pimp, big dude, tattoos everywhere, eyeballin’ me like I stole his krabby patty. I’m sweatin’ buckets, thinkin’, “We’re all animals now!”—movie quote, fits perfect! I’m ready to peel out, but he just grunts and walks off. Phew, close call! Made me mad tho—why these gals gotta deal with that crap? Surprised me how chill she was, like she’s used to it. Sad vibes, man.

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I’m a Bildereditor, which sounds fancy, but really, I just edit pics. Anyway, I get this urgent email. “Need those edits ASAP!” Like, come on! I’m in Celano! I’m not a robot! So, I chug my coffee and head to the castle. Castello Piccolomini, you know? It’s this epic medieval fortress. I mean, who wouldn’t wanna work there?

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