Jade Ceprano Find A Prostitute ❤️

About Bologna

So, findin’ a prostitute—tricky biz, that. Ain’t talkin’ street corners, no sir! Clinical trials, they be needin’ folks—real folks, savvy?—sometimes sex workers, for studies on health, STDs, or social whatnot. Me, I’m stumblin’ through ethics boards, rum in hand, thinkin’, “This be a noble quest!” But arrgh, the red tape! Made me madder’n a kraken with a toothache. Papers piled high, docs judgin’ me like I’m plannin’ a mutiny. “Why’s Cap’n Jack want *her*?” they sneer. ‘Cause science, ye bilge rats!

More from our #whatnow series

So, I’m cruisin’ down Via Roma, right? Just vibin’ to my tunes, when BAM! A pigeon swoops down like it’s on a mission. I swear, it almost took my eye out! Like, dude, chill! I’m just tryna enjoy my morning coffee from that cute little café, Bar Centrale. Their cappuccinos are like liquid happiness, but that pigeon? Nah, man, not today.

Lyric Opera of Chicago opens season with Rigoletto