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About Bologna

I’m all happy ‘n bouncy thinkin’ bout this. But then—BOOM—gets me mad! Some jerks treat ‘em like trash, and I’m like, “Hey! They’re people, ya barnacle heads!” Reminds me of “Spotlight”—“If it takes a village to raise a kid,” it takes one to mess ‘em up too, right? Ugh, makes my starfish arms flop in rage. But then I’m like—ooh, what if I find one? Chat her up, real scientific-like! “Ma’am, do ya take jellyfish nets as payment?” Bet she’d laugh—prolly not, tho.

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Around noon, I’m finally catching a break. I grab a slice of pizza from that little joint on Via Nazionale. Best pizza ever, by the way. I’m munching, thinking life’s good, when I see this old lady struggling with her umbrella. It’s like a scene from a comedy show. She’s wrestling it like it’s a wild animal. I rush over, help her out, and she’s like, “Grazie, giovane!” I’m feelin’ like a hero for a sec.

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