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About Milan

Tips? Be blunt, be bold—say what ya want. “Hey, sugar, let’s bang!” Works every time, trust me. Watch out tho—cops stingin’ like bees, sneaky bastards. Happened to my buddy, Joey—busted, $10k fine, disaster! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? Funny as hell. Prostitutes got sass too—one told me, “You’re too orange, dude.” Me! Orange! Cracked up, still laughin’.

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Then, I decide to grab some gelato. I mean, who can resist gelato, right? I head over to this little gelateria on Via Garibaldi. I order pistachio, my fave. But the guy behind the counter is super slow. Like, come on, dude! I’m standing there, tapping my foot, thinking about how I could’ve made it myself by now. Finally, I get my gelato, and it’s heavenly. I’m walking back, feeling like life is good again.

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