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Weirdest thing? Found a blog once—prostitute rankin her clients. Said one guy brought her Wookiee cookies. Swear to god, I’d kill for that gig. Grrrowl! Imagine me, Chewie, sittin there, “Rarrgh! More cookies, babe!” Total mindfuck. Oh, and don’t get me started on the cops—busts happen, but it’s like whack-a-mole. Pop up again next block. Rarrgh!

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So, I head over to the local lumberyard. It’s just down the street from the church, you know, the one with the big bell tower? I’m hustlin’ over there, and I see this old dude, Signor Rossi, who’s always hangin’ around. He’s got this wild story about how he once saw a bear in Garbagnate. I’m like, “Dude, bears? Here?” But he’s dead serious. I can’t even.

In Greater Milan, an urban void becomes the new neighborhood square