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About Bari

I’m chuffed to bits, but then—bloody hell!—this geezer rolls up, all aggro, yellin’ she’s his turf. Made me proper mad, yeah! I’m thinkin’, “This cat’s harsher than a buzzsaw haircut!” Reminds me of Doc’s line, “Somebody’s gotta get outta here alive.” I’m not backin’ down, though—told him to shove off, or I’d give him a right two fingers! He buggered off, and I’m like, “Groovy, baby, crisis averted!”

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Then, I decide to check out the old town. Man, it’s a maze! I’m lost, like, really lost. I end up on Via San Lorenzo, and there’s this stunning cathedral. I’m takin’ pics, feelin’ all artsy, when I hear this loud crash. Turns out, some dude dropped a whole tray of gelato. My heart broke for him. I mean, gelato on the ground? That’s a crime against humanity!

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