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About Florence

I’m picturin’ it now—me, bumbling around, tryna be slick. “You want to negotiate? I don’t negotiate!”—Carlos vibes again. Except I’d totally negotiate, ‘cause I’m cheap! Fifty bucks? A hundred? I’m hagglin’ like it’s a flea market. Oh, and the typos—my fat fingers mashin’ the phone, “helo sexy, wat u chrage?” Mortifying! She’d ghost me faster than you can say “Pretty, pretty good.”

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After that, I head over to the Parco della Valle. It’s this beautiful park, perfect for a breather. I’m sittin’ on a bench, just takin’ it all in. Kids are runnin’ around, dogs are barkin’, and I’m thinkin’, “This is nice.” But then, outta nowhere, a squirrel decides to make a run for my backpack. I’m like, “Dude, back off! I’m not sharing my snacks!” I swear, that little guy had some serious guts.

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