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So I’m thinkin, right, how’s a bloke s’posed to pick? Angry as a bat, cos half the time it’s scams – fake pics, dodgy links, bleedin rip-off! Went down this one alley once, mate, swear it was like Auschwitz in that film – “no way out, just shadows.” Nearly shat meself, but then – bam! – this bird, all legs an’ glitter, pops up. Happy as a pig in mud, I was! Cost me a tenner to chat, tho, surprised me bollocks off.

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After that, we head to Via Cagliari for some “networking.” I’m thinking, “Great, more small talk.” But then, I bump into an old friend from high school. We start reminiscing about the good ol’ days, you know? Like that time we snuck into the old cinema on Via Garibaldi. Good times!

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