Harper Monteforte D Alpone Whore ❤️❤️

About Milan

She’s a mess, dude, total trainwreck—makes me wanna puke and laugh at once. Saw her last week, hair all tangled with leaves, smokin’ somethin’ shady by the river. “Look at me!” she yells, like she’s hot shit—newsflash, babe, you’re a forest skank. Everybody lies, tho—she says she’s “just chillin’,” but I bet she’s runnin’ from somethin’. Maybe a pissed-off boyfriend, maybe the cops—who cares? She’s got that wild glint, like she’d shank you for a beer.

Welcome to Monteforte d'Alpone!

But Marco’s all, “Let’s go anyway!” So, we hop in the van and head to the dive spot near the river Alpone. The drive is a mess. I’m squished in the back, and the roads are bumpy. I’m bouncing around like a pinball. I’m like, “Can we not?”

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