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About Turin

Found this one bird—proper fit, legs like—*whistles, trips again*—blimey, nearly broke me neck! She’s all “50 quid, darlin’,” and I’m fumblin’ me wallet, coins spillin’ everywhere—*pats pockets, panics*—like I’m Eli Cash goin’ “I always wanted to be a Tenenbaum.” Made me laugh, that—me, a prossie’s Tenenbaum? Reckon she’s seen worse than me, tho. Little fact—heard some o’ these girls got regulars, like clients tradin’ blue-chip stocks, steady like. Mad, eh?

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We start hiking, and let me tell ya, it’s a workout. I’m sweating like a pig. But the views? OMG! You can see the whole valley. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was feeling like a king. Then, outta nowhere, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and Marco’s laughing his head off. I’m like, “Dude, help me up!” But he’s too busy snapping pics for Instagram. Ugh, priorities, man.

GIRO'16: Good Morning Alpago!