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About Naples

Alright, brah, listen up! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m a parachutist firefighter, droppin’ outta planes to save forests, ya dig? Now, you wanna talk findin’ a prostitute? Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like jumpin’ into a blaze with no chute! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *Let the Right One In*, that creepy Swedish vamp movie from ’08 – “I’m twelve, but I’ve been twelve for a long time” – and it’s got me wonderin’ how some stuff just sneaks up on ya, like a hooker in the night!

Welcome to Roveredo in Piano!

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First off, I woke up late. Classic me. Alarm? What alarm? I jumped outta bed, threw on whatever was clean (which was like, nothing), and bolted out the door. I mean, who needs breakfast when you’ve got the charming streets of Roveredo-in-Piano waiting for ya?

J.T. Lambert's new boss has wealth of experience