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We haggle, ‘cause I’m a stingy git—fifteen quid, final offer. She rolls her eyes, mutters “cheap bastard,” but off we go, her heels clackin’ like a typewriter. Me mind’s racin’—what if the coppers nab us? Or worse, me mum finds out? Angry as a hornet I am, at meself fer bein’ such a numpty, yet happy too—freedom, thou art a tart in fishnets!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running for cover, dodging puddles like I’m in some weird obstacle course. I duck into a shop on Via della Repubblica. It’s a tiny bookstore, and I’m like, “Okay, I’ll wait it out.”

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