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About Milan

So picture this, I’m an accountant, crunchin numbers all day, bored outta my skull, and I’m thinkin, “I need some excitement, somethin wild!” Not that I’m hirin one, mind ya, but I got curious—how’s it even work? I dig around, and turns out, back in the day, like 1800s, prostitutes in NYC had these lil coded ads in newspapers! “Lost lady seeks gentleman”—yeah, right, lost my ass! *Nanny laugh* HAH-HAH! Sneaky lil hustlers, I love it—kinda clever, ya know?

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some breakfast. You know, the usual—cappuccino and a cornetto. But the barista? Ugh, she was in a mood. Like, chill, lady! It’s just coffee, not a life decision. I mean, I get it, mornings suck, but c’mon!

A Clockwork Orange: in UCI cinemas from Dec. 29 to Dec. 1 to mark the 50th anniversary