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About Florence

So, I’m hagglin’ with her, right, and she’s all, “Cash upfront, darling!” I’m thinkin’, “I could erase you from my mind,” like Jim Carrey, yeah? But she’s foxy, got that minx vibe—makes me happy as a pig in muck. I fork over the quid, and we’re off, shaggin’ like it’s 1969! Mid-thrust, I’m yellin’, “Oh, behave!”—total Austin moment, mate.

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After that, I decide to hit up the market on Via Garibaldi. It’s always buzzing with life. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the best cheese you can imagine. I’m eyeing this wheel of Parmigiano-Reggiano, and I swear, it’s calling my name. But then, I trip over a crate. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and everyone’s staring. I just laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “Why, universe, why?”

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