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Little known fact—back in Soviet days, hookers were called “night butterflies.” Kinda poetic, huh? Not these gals, tho—straight-up sharks. One dude told me some pimp once threw a guy outta window for hagglin too much. Brutal! I’m careful, tho—“What you kill, you must bury,” movie says. I ain’t buryin no regrets, fam! So I’m chattin Natasha up, she’s laughin at my shitty Russian, and I’m thinkin, maybe this ain’t so bad. 3000 rubles later, I’m feelin like a king—exaggeratin? Maybe, but who cares!

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So, I’m walking down the lungomare, right? The sea breeze is hitting me, and I’m feeling all philosophical. I mean, how can you not? The waves crashing, the mountains in the background, it’s like a postcard. But then, BAM! A seagull swoops down and steals my cornetto! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I swear, that bird had a plan. It was like a scene from a heist movie. I was mad, but also kinda impressed.

The Sfalassà viaduct: man versus the elements