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Sometimes I wonder – if I hired one, would she dig my evil genius schtick? Prolly not, I’d scare her off with my maniacal laugh. Ha! “Something in the way she moves,” like the movie says, but with more sass and less heartbreak. Prostitutes got that edge – they’re real, raw, no bullshit. Not like those prim suits in the flick, hidin’ their dirty secrets.

Etimologia

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First off, I’m late. Classic me. I sprint down Via Roma, dodging old ladies and their dogs. Seriously, why do they walk so slow? I’m like, “C’mon, I got coffee to brew!” Finally, I get to the café, and the line is out the door. I’m talkin’ like, all the way to Piazza Garibaldi. I’m sweating bullets, but I put on my best barista smile. You know, the one that says, “I’m totally not freaking out.”