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Then – jackpot! Found this one chick, all sassy, says she’s “discreet like a shadow.” I’m sold! We chat, and I’m gigglin’ like a kid – happy vibes, finally! She’s quotin’ prices like it’s a damn auction, and I’m over here goin’, “ Hashem don’t count the money, so why should I?” – straight outta *A Serious Man*, baby! But real talk, it’s steep – like, 200 bucks steep. I’m shocked! Thought it’d be cheaper, like gas station sushi. But she’s got style, and I’m weak for that.

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But then, I see this guy trying to steal someone’s phone. I’m like, “Not on my watch!” I rush over, and we have this mini showdown. I’m yelling, “Dude, back off!” The crowd’s watching, and I’m feeling like a hero. I manage to get the phone back, and the crowd goes wild!

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