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I spot this chick, leather skirt, smokin a cig. I roll up, all chill, but inside I’m like – “Is this it?” She’s givin me that look, y’know, sizin me up. “What’s your party trick?” I mutter, half-jokin, straight outta *Toni Erdmann*. She laughs, raspy, says, “Honey, I’m the whole damn circus.” I’m fuckin sold, man – happy as hell, she’s got sass!

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So, I step outta my place on Via Roma, and boom! The sun is shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be great!” But then, I remember I forgot my coffee. Ugh! I sprint to the café on Piazza della Libertà. You know, the one with the cute barista? Yeah, her. I’m all flustered, and I spill my espresso all over my shirt. Classic me, right?

Mareno’s Grande Italian adventure