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Ain’t proud, y’all, but it was a hoot—kinda like milkin’ a cow that kicks! Exaggeratin’ a tad, maybe, but it felt like a dang movie scene! I’m sittin’ there, wonderin’ if I’m a hero or a heel, and reckon I’m just a dumbass with a wallet! “How’s that workin’ for ya, Phil?”—spoiler, it ain’t! Still, beats watchin’ paint dry, and I got a story to tell ya over beers! What y’all think—crazy, huh?

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I finally get to him, and he’s just sitting there, looking all sad. “What happened?” I ask. Turns out, he missed the bus. Again. I can’t even. We laugh it off, but I’m still annoyed.

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