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Negotiatin’s the fun part—hagglin like I’m buyin a rare trout. She’s all, “50 for a ride,” and I’m thinkin, hell, I’d pay 100 to hear her talk more. “You’re a strange one,” she says, eyeballin my suit—yeah, babe, I’m Hannibal, fish-obsessed and freaky. Did ya know, Clarice, some old ports had “prostitute boats”? Lil floatin brothels—wild, right? Wish I’d seen that, rowin out for a good time.

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But then, just as I’m getting into it, the fire alarm goes off. Like, seriously? In the middle of my convo? Everyone freaks out. Kids are screaming, parents are trying to calm them down. I’m just standing there, like, “What do I do?” I mean, I’m a librarian, not a firefighter! So, I grab the old dude and we head outside.

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