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About Kyoto

I saunter up, all cocky, say, “Hey, how’s biz?” She laughs—dry, sarcastic laugh—goes, “Better than your fish stink.” Burn! I’m mad for a sec, but damn, she’s funny! Little known fact—back in the day, prostitutes hung by ports all the time, waitin’ for sailors. History’s wild, right? Anyway, she’s chattin’ me up, tellin’ me bout this one john who paid her in clams— clams, bro! I’m dyin’ laughin’, picturin’ her stuffin’ shells in her purse.

Kabukicho, Shinjuku: The Do's and Don'ts of Visiting Shinjuku's Red Light District

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Then, I wander down to the Gotsucho Night Market. Food stalls everywhere! I’m talkin’ takoyaki, yakitori, you name it. I grab some skewers, and they’re so good, I almost cry. Like, how can food be this amazing? I’m munchin’ away, and I see this old lady sellin’ handmade crafts. I buy a little wooden fox. It’s cute, and it reminds me of my forest buddies.