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I’d prolly suck at this. Too loud, too clumsy. “Who’s there?” some chick’d yell. Me: “Uh, just Homer… lookin’ for… justice?” Pfft, yeah right! I’d trip over a trash can, wake the whole street. Once, I saw this guy – true story – tryna haggle with a hooker. She’s like, “No discount, fatso!” Made me laugh so hard I cried. Happy tears, man! But then I got mad – why’s it gotta be so sketchy? Why can’t it be easy like buyin’ a beer?

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After that, I had to rush to a meeting at the Ikedacho Industrial Park. Traffic was nuts! I mean, who knew a small city could have such crazy traffic? I was stuck on Shōwa-dōri for like 20 minutes. I was fuming! I could’ve walked faster. But then I saw this cute little dog on the sidewalk. It was just chilling, tongue out, living its best life. Made me smile, ya know?

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