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Oh, and the lies! Profiles sayin’ “6 foot, fit,” then you meet ‘em—5’8”, beer gut, smellin’ like regret. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I’d say, if I could pick the liars out. Surprised me how bold they get—catfishin’ like it’s an Olympic sport. One time, this bloke sent me a dick pic, unasked! I’m like, “Mate, I didn’t order sausage!” Laughed my ass off, but also—eww, boundaries, ya pig!

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So, I’m walking down the street, trying to shake off the coffee disaster. The sun’s shining, and I’m thinking, “Okay, maybe today won’t be so bad.” I pass by the Ishikari River, and it’s beautiful. The water’s glistening, and I’m like, “Wow, nature, you do your thing.” But then I see a bunch of kids throwing rocks into the river. I mean, really? What’s the point? I almost yelled, “Hey, save the fish!” but I just kept walking.

As Japan makes major investments in wind power, some residents are pushing back