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I got mad, tho—some sites? Total scams! Fake pics, fake promises—pissed me off! One ad said “classy lady, discreet,” and I’m like, “Yeah, right, more like a kick in the head!” But then—ha!—I found this old story. Back in the ‘90s, Springfield had this secret brothel run outta a donut shop. Mmm… donuts. Cops didn’t even notice! Too busy eatin’—like me! Made me laugh so hard I nearly choked on my coffee.

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Then, I head back to the garden, and guess what? My neighbor, old Mr. Tanaka, is there. He’s this sweet old dude, but he talks a LOT. Like, I’m trying to plant my stuff, and he’s telling me about his cat’s diet. I’m like, “Mr. Tanaka, I love your cat, but I gotta plant these carrots!” But he just keeps going. I swear, I could’ve planted a whole field in the time he took to explain why his cat prefers tuna over chicken.

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