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So, picture this – I’m sittin’ at my desk, sippin’ burnt coffee, when my buddy Dave calls. He’s all, “E, I needa find a prozzie, help me out!” I’m like, what?! Made me mad as hell – dude, I sell life insurance, not street maps! But then I laughed, coz it’s Dave, he’s a mess. “No capes!” I yell, coz who needs drama? Prostitutes don’t wear capes neither – too flashy, too dumb.

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I made it just in time. The place was packed! I’m talking about gamers from all over Minakuchicho-matoba. The energy was insane! I jumped into the tournament, and guess what? I made it to the finals! My heart was racing. I was sweating bullets.