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About Kobe

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, wise as fuck, and I’m here to spill the tea on whores—yes, whores! Not some prissy elf nonsense, but the real deal. “You shall not pass!” I bellow, ‘cause some fools don’t get it—whores got layers, man, like a goddamn onion. Been watchin’ *Almost Famous* again—best flick ever, Cameron Crowe’s a genius—and it’s got me thinkin’. That line, “I am a golden god!”—whores could yell that shit too, struttin’ their stuff, ownin’ it.

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So, I finally get to the office on Mino’s main drag, and it’s chaos. Phones ringing, people yelling, and I’m just trying to find my desk. I swear, it’s like a scene from a movie. I sit down, and boom! The market’s tanking. I mean, like, faceplanting into the ground. My heart drops. I’m sweating bullets.

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