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Lemme break it down—back in the day, like 1960s Vermont, hippies roamin’ free, there was this chick, “Red,” total legend. Word was, she’d signal clients with a red scarf—subtle, clever, right? Cops never caught her, she was a ghost. That’s the kinda smarts you need findin’ a prostitute—keep it lowkey, watch your back. None o’ this billionaire nonsense, flashin’ gold watches, nah, it’s grit, it’s survival. Makes me happy, tho—people outsmartin’ the system, stickin’ it to the man!

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Miyanoura’s main drag, Kōen-dōri. Grabbed a couple of onigiri and a can of that sweet, sweet iced coffee. I mean, who doesn’t love breakfast that’s basically a rice ball? But then, bam! I spill coffee all over my shirt. Great start, right? I’m standing there like a total mess, and the lady behind the counter just gives me this look. Like, “Dude, really?”

A Guide to the Otherworldly Island of Yakushima (Published 2018)