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This one chick, red dress tighter than my stock portfolio, winks at me. I’m like—hell yea, jackpot! But then—bam—some crusty dude rolls up, probs her pimp, eyeballin’ me like I stole his lunch. Pissed me off, man! I’m yellin’ in my head, “I’m the client here, asshole!” Kept my cool tho—Gekko don’t flinch. “What can I do for you?” she purrs, straight outta Spielberg’s script. I’m thinkin’—damn, she’s smooth, like a robot lover programmed to please.

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But then, as we were leaving, I saw this cute cat chilling by the entrance. I’m a sucker for cats, so I bent down to pet it. And guess what? It totally ignored me! Like, how rude! I laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “C’mon, cat, I’m trying to be nice here!”

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