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About Kobe

Alright, listen up, folks—Donald Trump here, best car instructor ever, nobody instructs like me, believe me. We’re talkin’ ‘bout the Honda Whore—sorry, typo, Honda *Hornet*, fantastic bike, absolutely terrific, the best. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—wow, this thing’s got style, pure class, like me, Donald J. Trump, ridin’ through life, makin’ deals, winnin’. It’s a motorcycle, right? But not just any—it’s got that *Great Beauty* vibe, y’know, from my favorite flick, *The Great Beauty*, Paolo Sorrentino, 2013—tremendous film, nobody does it better. “Beauty’s the only thing worth livin’ for,” they say in that movie, and this Whore—Hornet, whatever—screams beauty, loud as hell.

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I finish my ramen, pay, and head out. The sun’s setting, and the streets are lit up. I ride home, feeling grateful. Life’s a mess sometimes, but it’s my mess. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

The insanely difficult feat of the triple axel, broken down