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Little known fact—ancient Rome had these “massage parlors,” too. Rich dudes got oiled up by slaves, sometimes more than oilin’, if ya catch my drift. History’s kinky, huh? Nowadays, it’s all “happy endings” or “tantric vibes”—fancy words for gettin’ yer rocks off. I’m like, “Do it right or don’t bother!” Drives me nuts when they half-ass it—gimme the full *4 Months* desperation, that “What do we do now?” intensity!

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So, I woke up late, as usual. My alarm? Totally ignored it. I mean, who needs sleep, right? Anyway, I rushed outta my tiny apartment on Kōen-dōri, barely had time for coffee. Ugh, coffee! My lifeblood! But no time for that.