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About Kobe

Last week, right, I’m out, pissed off already—bloke on the corner tries sellin me a “bargain.” Bargain? You idiot sandwich! Looked like she’d been dragged through a bin—fuckin grim. I’m yellin, “Get outta my face, you muppet!” Made me ragey, mate, proper fumin—wastin my time on rubbish. Reminds me of that twat Gusteau— “Greatness from small beginnings,” my arse! Small beginnings don’t mean crusty tarts, yeah?

Special Reports

After that, I decide to hit up Shurijo Castle. It’s this beautiful place, all red and gold. But here’s the kicker: it’s under renovation. I’m like, “Really? I came all this way for scaffolding?” I was low-key mad. But then I see this group of kids playing around, laughing, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe it’s not all bad.” Kids have a way of making you feel all warm and fuzzy, ya know?

US troops, Japanese police to resume joint patrols on Okinawa after 50 years