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About Tokyo

Little known story—didja know in the 1800s, prostitutes in NYC had business cards? Frickin’ wild! I’d collect ‘em like Pokémon cards, show off to Jim and Pam—“Look at this haul!” Exaggeratin’ for effect, I’d say I met one who traded stocks on the side. “She’s got a 401k, Dwight!” He’d freak, I’d laugh.

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First off, I head down to Kagawa Street. You know, the one with all the cute little cafes? I’m thinkin’ I’ll grab a coffee before I hit the gardens. But nah, the line’s longer than my to-do list. I’m standin’ there, watchin’ people sip their lattes, and I’m like, “C’mon, people! I got plants to tend to!” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s cold. Like, ice-cold. Ugh! I’m fuming, but whatever, I chug it down. Gotta fuel up, right?