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About Osaka

Oi, mateys, gather ‘round, savvy? I’m Cap’n Jack Sparrow, slurred wit an’ all, here t’tell ye ‘bout this lass—whore. Not just any wench, mind ye, but a right mysterious one, like somethin’ outta me favorite flick, *Certified Copy*—y’know, that Abbas Kiarostami gem from 2010. “Are you sure it’s real?”—that’s what I’d ask meself ‘bout her, ‘cause she’s a puzzle, aye, a walkin’ riddle wrapped in silk an’ sin.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Chuo-dori. You know, the one with the best onigiri? Yeah, that one. I grabbed a couple, and the cashier was super friendly. Like, too friendly. I’m just tryna get my breakfast, dude! But whatever, I smiled back. Gotta keep it cool, right?

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