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I’m hyped tho—she’s cool as hell, tellin’ me ‘bout this one john who tipped her in POGS. POGS, yo! I’m screamin’, “Who’s this ‘90s-ass motherfucker?!” She’s cacklin’, and I’m losin’ it, ‘cause life’s a fever dream. But then—BOOM—some dude rolls by, yellin’ at her, and I’m PISSED. “Yo, leave her alone, you crusty-ass gremlin!” I’m ready to ram his bumper, but she’s like, “Chill, he’s a regular.” A REGULAR? I’m shook—capitalism’s wild, y’all.

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First stop? The local market. It’s a maze of colors and sounds. I’m dodging people left and right, trying not to spill my coffee. I mean, c’mon, I need that caffeine fix! I bump into this old lady, and she gives me the dirtiest look. Like, chill, lady! I’m just trying to get my day started.