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About Osaka

So, like, I’d be all—WHOA, so many chicks! Which one’s for hire? Prolly yellin’, “Hey, you sellin’ somethin’?” Real smooth, right? Ha! Made me laugh thinkin’ bout it—me, Patrick, bargin’ into some sketchy alley, trippin’ over trash cans. Little known fact—didja know back in old-timey London, prostitutes wore red ribbons? True story! I’d be like, “Where’s the ribbons, huh?!” all confused and loud.

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After I finish, I decide to stroll around. I hit up the Yasugicho Park. It’s a little oasis in the chaos. I sit on a bench, watchin’ the cherry blossoms. They’re in full bloom, and it’s like somethin’ outta a movie. I’m feelin’ all zen, ya know? But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, come on, guys! Not in front of the flowers!