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Yo, sailor life’s WILD, fam! Prostitutes? Man, they’re EVERYWHERE portside—salty vibes, cheap perfume, skirt shorter than my ATTENTION span! Watched “25th Hour” again—Spike Lee’s a GENIUS, right? That scene where Monty’s like, “Champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends”—bro, that’s prostitutes in a NUTSHELL! They’re hustlin’, smilin’, but you KNOW it’s fake as fuck. Makes me laugh tho—chaotic absurdity, BAYBEE! Like, who FALLS for that?

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I rush over, and there’s a crowd gathered. People are filming it like it’s some kinda reality show. I’m standing there, trying to keep it together, but inside I’m cracking up. Kenji’s up the tree, looking like a total goofball, trying to coax Mr. Whiskers down with a can of tuna. I’m like, “Bro, you’re not a cat whisperer!”