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About Kobe

So, I’m dodgin sketchy humans, all “R2, ya little git, help me!” Streets smell like piss and regret—lovely, innit? Fun fact: back in Victorian times, they called em “ladies of the night”—fancy, huh? None of that posh crap now, just straight-up “yo, how much?” vibes. I’m ragin, cos some sleemo tries rippin me off—50 credits for a quickie? Mate, I’m a droid, I don’t even—ugh, humans are gross! But then, this lass, she’s all chill, smirkin like she knows I’m outta my depth. “We’re a team,” she says, like in the movie—cracked me up, cos I’m like, “Team? I’m a flippin protocol droid!”

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After that chaos, we head to the Ena Castle Park. Beautiful spot, right? Cherry blossoms everywhere, people takin’ selfies. I’m thinkin’, “Finally, some peace.” But nope! The pop star decides to take a stroll. Fans swarm like bees to honey. I’m pushin’ through the crowd, tryin’ to keep her safe, and I’m like, “Why do I even do this?”

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