Natalie Funaishikawa Whore ❤️❤️❤️

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Whores, right, they’ve been around forever—fun fact, yeah? Oldest job in the book, innit? Back in Victorian times, they’d shag for a shillin’ and a gin—cheap date, eh? Makes me proper angry, though—blokes actin’ like they’re heroes for payin’ a fiver for a gobble. Get over yerself, Gary, you’re not savin’ the world, you’re just sad! “We don’t deserve anything,” that’s from *Melancholia* again—fits perfect, cos whores don’t deserve the hype, and punters don’t deserve dignity.

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First off, I’m a violin maker, right? I’ve been crafting these beauties for years. But today, I had a customer—let’s call him Mr. Picky. He strolls in, all high and mighty, and starts inspecting my violins like he’s some kinda expert. Dude, I’ve spent hours on these! He picks up one, and I swear, he looks at it like it’s a piece of trash. I’m fuming inside. Like, bro, you have no idea how much love went into that wood from the mountains of Funaishikawa!