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Happy now, I got her, very nice! She talk, say johns pay big, some famous, wawaweewa! I write fast, 19 typo, who care, “famus,” “prostitue,” “detetive” – me, genius! Exaggerate? Yes, I say, “She tallest lady ever, 10 feet!” Funny, ya? I ask, “You like Royal Tenenbaums?” She say, “What?” I sad, best movie, she no taste!

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I can’t help but laugh. I mean, come on! It’s Hirakata, not a demolition derby! But then I feel bad for the guy. He’s probably gonna lose his job. So, I grab a couple of my fresh melon breads and run outside. “Hey, man! You want some?” He looks at me like I’m a weirdo, but then he takes ‘em. I’m like, “Sweet! At least I’m spreading the love, right?”

Rocky Ford melons are hitting grocery store shelves, helping the local economy