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About Saitama

So, I’m at the office, right? Bored outta my skull. Phones ringin’, papers everywhere, and I’m like, “Why not find a pro?” Not for me, ya dope—research! Yeah, that’s it. I start diggin’, and—D’oh!—turns out it ain’t as easy as orderin’ a pizza. You’d think, “Oh, just hit the streets!” Nope. These days, it’s all sneaky-like, online stuff, coded ads—wild! Didja know some use emojis? Eggplant means one thing, peach another. Freakin’ surprised me, man! I’m sittin’ there, starin’ at my screen, thinkin’, “This is limbo, man!” Like Cobb in *Inception*, lost in layers of crazy.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kameido Street. Gotta love those onigiri, right? I grabbed a couple, and as I was munching, I noticed this old dude staring at me. Like, bro, I’m just trying to enjoy my breakfast! I mean, it’s not like I’m wearing a neon sign saying “Look at me!” But whatever, I shrugged it off.

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