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So, findin’ a prostitute—ain’t no picnic, darlin’. Back in my day, I reckon it was hush-hush, sneaky-like. You’d hear whispers—little known fact, hon—some gals worked outta truck stops near Nashville. Called ‘em “lot lizards,” sassy as all get-out! Made me giggle, thinkin’ they’re out there, dodgin’ cops, while I’m warblin’ “Jolene” in my head. “Please don’t take my man!”—ha, like they’d want my sorry hide!

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But then, the lights flicker back on, and everyone’s cheerin’. I’m just relieved I didn’t drop my bowl. We finish up, and I’m feelin’ good. But then, I step outside, and it’s pouring rain. Of course it is! I didn’t bring an umbrella. I’m soaked in seconds.

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