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Then, mate, I hit the jackpot, yeah! This curvy minx, red lips, smokin’ hot, standin’ by a lampost – classic! Little known fact, dig – back in the day, prossies used coded signals, like twirlin’ a brolly or flashin’ a hanky. She’s givin’ me the eye, I’m thinkin’, “Groovy, baby, she’s the one!” Saunter over, all smooth-like, sayin’, “Fancy a bit of how’s your father?” She giggles, I’m chuffed, heart’s racin’ – Austin’s still got it, yeah!

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OMG, that anko was life-changing! Sweet, but not too sweet. I was on cloud nine. But then, I spill half my latte all over my shirt. Great. Just great. I look like I’ve been in a food fight.

Illustrations at core of reopened Battle of Okinawa museum lay bare the horrors of war