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Heya doll, it’s me, Marilyn – breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President.” – spillin’ the tea on findin’ a prostitute, ‘cause why not? So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *Carlos* (2010, Olivier Assayas, duh), that sexy revolutionary vibe, all chaos and cash, and it hits me – findin’ a pro aint so different! You gotta hustle, chase the thrill, like Carlos dodgin’ cops, only you’re dodgin’ broke-ass vibes instead.

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But then, I step outside, and it’s pouring rain. Like, outta nowhere! I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running for cover, and I slip on the sidewalk. Classic! I’m lying there, laughing at myself. “What a day, right?”

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